Women love it rough. Just how rough might actually surprise you- try asking some of the women you know well. The secret to being the kind of man a woman will fantasize about for the rest of her life isn’t actually much of a secret at all: you just have to fulfill all her secret fantasies.
Ha, easy, right? But don’t worry. In this article we’ll hold your hand. Real tight. And by the time we’re all through- that’s a good boy- you’ll understand just why women love BDSM and rough play, and this will help you to create the perfect environment for sexperimentation… ensuring you a spot in her heart… and elsewhere…
Okay, real quick, a definition of BDSM. It’s actually an abbreviation for a bunch of the deliciously wild things that often end up going together:
BD- Bondage and discipline.
DS- Dominance and submission.
SM- Sadism and masochism.
These are all pairings that fit together like an apple and a knife.
You can’t exactly do too much with two knives other than start a fire or a war, so if you’re both dominant, you’ll have to take turns being the apple.
But trust us- everyone loves to be dominated (when they are in a safe environment) and the feeling of release each of you will experience is nothing short of extraordinary.
Anyway, moving on. So- why do women love to be manhandled? When 50 Shades of Grey came out and immediately caught the entire lady population of the world on fire, lots of guys were scratching their heads.
“You guys are ALL into that? Seriously? Well…. damn.”
Because you were raised to ask nicely, right? You were raised to assume that ‘good girls’ don’t do the naughty stuff. Here’s why you’re wrong:
A LITTLE BIT OF BAD IN THE BEST OF US
Think about Miley Cyrus & Britney Spears. Disney princesses gone wild. Now it seems obvious, but when they were innocent little apple-cheeked tots you would never have guessed where they’d end up.
Why? Because when little miss apple pie steps over to the wild side, the world loves it. Her parents and immediate peer group might not, but there’s a big bad world out there that feeds into it.
And as soon as she becomes brave enough to take that first step outside her safe little circle, the roar of the crowd will just get louder and louder.
All girls have the ‘bad’ seed, the potential to be ‘naughty’, whether or not they ever publically explore it. And interestingly enough, its the ones who are most deeply repressed who have the biggest seeds of all…
REPRESSION
Often, once a very conservative and religious girl gets into a relationship and experiences sex for the first time, a switch flips. Especially if you are confident and know how to take her through her paces.
Because all her desires have been pent up for so long, they’ve become incredibly strong, and she herself sometimes has no idea how to handle them.
If you, however, do… if you learn to read the signs and can tell when she’d like you to tie her up and slap her a little, etc, and if you actually do it… she’ll go crazy.
It’s true. The more conservative the girl, the wilder she has the potential to be. It’s like a kid who has never tasted candy in their entire life getting set loose in a candy store. Sure, they’ll be a little shy about it first… but once they get that first taste, they’re in a race to make up for lost time, lost experience.
Women enjoy sex just as much as men do, but society necessarily tells them to bottle up their desires because they- truly- do have so much more to lose than men if they act irresponsibly.
(Think about the consequences for a fifteen year old girl if she gets pregnant, as opposed to what happens to the dude. Her life is pretty much over for twenty years, whereas he just has another bill in the mail.)
That said, once she feels safe with you and feels that she is in a safe environment (you always use protection, and you make her feel good about herself) she is free to explore. All you have to do is take her hand and lead her.
HOW TO TURN HER ON WITH TOUCH
Women want to be dominated. Think about it: they are the submissive gender. From a sexual standpoint, they evolved that way. Women fantasize about sex just like men do- but just as much as you think about wanting to grab her, push into her, dominate her, all that… she fantasizes about having all that done to her.
But Western men are taught to hold back. Leaving women very, very frustrated! Because- especially as the submissive gender- they do not want to have to tell you what to do.
They want you to just know, and to just do it. Sound familiar?
All too often they can’t find that. Which is why they go nuts for silly books like 50 Shades and Twilight, and every variation in between. Women want equality when they’re out in the public world- but they do not want it in sex.
LOVE TO BE BAD
All right, you’re all in. But you need a few ideas. What exactly does she want me to do? If its a new relationship and you’re nervous- or you want to spice things up after a few years, but this is your girlfriend we’re talking about- it can be really hard to know how to get started.
Here’s some ideas. Women love public sex. That’s an easy one. Escalate her so that she’s ready to go, and make discreet love to her in a dark corner of the club (or in a car, or in a bathroom). Everything you do will feel amplified to her, so if she’s into it, try biting her ear or her neck. She’ll be talking about this for years, I promise.
Want to go further?
Try throwing her around. Throw her on the bed, on the sofa. Watch her neck, you know, but literally: pick her up and throw her. If you’re making out, slam her into the wall before ripping her clothes off. She might also like being tied up, yelled at, spanked, whipped, or even chained.
Odds are she won’t even know she wants this things. You’re going to have to be confident and just start doing them- if she responds in kind, keep going.
The experience can be profoundly cathartic as well as arousing. Once you know how to turn her on with touch, if she’s releasing a lot of stuff, she might even start crying- and you’ll know they are happy tears, so don’t worry. But don’t freak out if this happens. Just hold her, and say sweet things. She’ll love it. Trust.
LEVELS
You are going to have to ease into things a little bit at first. Both of you will probably be shocked at your response to this. How to find out what the both of you are into, and make fantasies come true? Pay attention her body language. Her body will literally come alive under your hands. She’ll be breathing more quickly, and more than likely, she’ll be making sounds you never imagined she could make. Relish it!
BE A MAN
Alright, gentlemen- if you’re serious, it’s time to get serious. You really will have to reprogram your mind for this to work. You’ve been socially conditioned all your life to do exactly opposite of what she really wants (in the bedroom). This article can only be a catalyst for change: the change itself is up to you.
Maybe taking charge in the bedroom will unleash something powerful in the rest of your life, too. Once you start bucking social convention, well, it’s hard to stop.
Thinking for yourself and doing what comes naturally will not just turn on your woman- it will turn you on, too. Your health habits will change, if you start tuning into your body and doing what it ‘wants’ you to do. So will your social habits, and even your career.
If you continue to be really honest with yourself about what it is you really want to do, right now, and then are disciplined about seeing things through- you might wind up an icon, like Steve Jobs- or maybe just a guy enjoying the shit out of his life. Who says it always has to be about making her dreams come true, anyway?
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